Twas the night before

My 30 day program starts tomorrow. I can't tell you how excited I am that it does not require me to go 100 percent raw. I really think that I can manage and possible sustain the way this program is laid out. There is definitely the option of 100 percent for the people that want it, but that is not me. It is so funny that we don't grasp some of the easiest concepts. I was reading through some of the material tonight and saw that what is suggested for 50 to 75 percent raw is completely doable for me. It requires that I only eat when hungry which I can handle. Breakfast for me is usually raw. Either a smoothie or green drink. Lunch is raw about half the time. All I need to do is either make it all raw all the time or eat a small portion of cooked food with a big salad or other raw item. Dinner then can stay cooked as long as I have a big salad or other raw item with it. I can have my cooked dinner as a side dish. I am actually starting to get a little jazzed about this.

Raw perspective

Ritamarie asked me if I would participate in a 30 days to raw program that a women in England (Karen Knowler) is doing. I told her that I would love to. I was very honest when I signed up for the program and told the Karen that I have no desire to be 100% raw. I also was a bit nervous about if this would send me back into a food obsession.

The program starts on Monday and we had a pre-program call this afternoon. I went into the call feeling a bit disgruntled about making diet changes again. I was also unsure about how interesting it would be to be on a conference call for an hour. I was pleasantly surprised by what I got out of the phone call. I have renewed enthusiasm for taking this on. During the phone call, Karen mentioned that we all have different goals for what we are going to get out of the program. It is a lot easier for me to hear that I am trying to meet my own goals and not someone else's. I think that maybe I thought the goal was for all of us to be 100% raw eventually. She also talked about some of the homework and how we may all have a different area that we need help (spiritual, physical, mental, emotional).

I really like the idea of coming out of this with my goals met even if they aren't to become 100% raw.

Weight = Mood?

It is so sad how much my weight and my mood are linked. I am sure some of it has to do with whether I feel capable or not, wheter I am exercising, and what the fuel I put into my body does to my spirit, but a lot of it is directly linked to my weight. Even though I didn't gain weight during the holidays, the lady that did the food addiction counseling with me said I should have lost about 10 pounds by now. She says that the holidays shouldn't have been a factor. I disagree. I didn't overeat and showed a lot of restraint, but I also ate out more often and ate different foods than I normally do. Normally I eat something small like a smoothie in the morning, raw food or a salad or soup for lunch and then a normal dinner. During the holidays, I was eating three full meals a day! I have been sort of depressed the last few weeks. By the end of last week, I was back to eating normal. Yesterday and today I did some dancing around to music and I bit of toning on the ball and all of a sudden my mood has changed. Of course, I did get on the scale and saw a slight weight decrease too. So maybe it is not as mood driven as I thought. Maybe it is all about the movement and fuel I put into my body.

Happy New Year!

Well, I actually made it through the holidays without gaining weight. I didn't lose any, but I didn't gain either. I think that is pretty good considering all the eating out we did and all the cookies that were in the house. I really wasn't too tempted by the cookies (most of the time). I started getting closer to losing my control when everyone left. At that point, eating out was becoming a habit. I was having a harder time deciding when to finish my food and not over eat. I am back on track now. One thing I am trying to work with is food choices. I have done very well with eliminating cravings and not over eating. Now I need to extend this to appropriate foods at appropriate times. It all comes down to seeing food as fuel, having enough healthy fuel available, listening to what my body needs at that exact time, and not thinking ahead about food. It gets so hard because there is such a fine line between making sure you have enough healthy food as fuel around but not getting into "diet" planning like what you should eat when. It is an important distinction. Making that distinction and moving my body more are at the top of my list right now. My resolution this year is to listen to my body and give it what it needs when it needs it whether it be fuel, exercise, meditation, rest, etc.