Feeling better

I think I am done wallowing in self pity for the time being. The beginning of the week, I really reverted to ols addiction habits and the thoughts of, "I should be able to eat whatever I want," and "What is the most emotionally satisfying food I can eat, even if I don't really want it." As the week progressed, I got disgusted with myself and realized that filling my body with crap was affecting my coping skills. I still had a lot of times eating out but I started ordering salads instead of burgers. I really think that the group of friends I have are very helpful also. These are not binge friends. They all watch what they eat and exercise often. The support is definitely there. I already told you guys my summer eating plan (that no one commented on) and that I am going to walk most days. I've also decided to swim laps (with a kick board at first) on the days that I'm not walking. Something unusual happened to me yesterday. Even though I still have eating events this weekend to come, I remembered that I could actually follow my program except for those events. It felt kind of cool to not reach for food this morning just because I could. I only had green powder and water. I plan on a salad for lunch.

I am also working on a loose schedule for the girls this summer to limit the TV time. We are going to have outside time in the morning, craft time, reading time, and playing in your room alone and not bugging your sister time. Once a week they are getting a standing playdate so that I can volunteer with Ritamarie and once a week we are having field trip day. We will see how all this goes because I am not the best at following a schedule with parenting.